Dear Xi Jinping (And The Rest Of the CCP)

We know you are in a pretty bad predicament of your own making, Xi.  The virus you infected the world with and then tried your darnedest to keep out is now finally coming back to give you a big dose of karma.  And your iron-fisted totalitarian "Zero Covid" (lol) strategy is now collapsing as we speak, and your people are finally fighting back.  Here's how you can come as close as you possibly can to saving face:

1. End the lockdowns immediately and open up, cold turkey.  Yesterday. 
2. Have plenty of vitamins, HCQ, Ivermectin, budesonide, and stuff like that ready for the inevitable virus surge.  Because your population's natural immunity has been weakened by nearly three years of this nonsense, and your vaccines are kind of a joke.  (Not like ours are really much better, of course.)
3. Apologize and make whole everyone you have wronged as best you can.  (Tall order, we know.)
4. STEP DOWN.

And don't let the door hit you on the way out!

Sincerely, 

The Rest of the World

P.S.  You really do look a lot like Winnie the Pooh.

DECEMBER UPDATE:  Looks like Xi and the CCP finally ended their inane and insane Zero Covid policy.   That goes to show that protests actually work.